Shampan, Shambles!

Oh dear, what was I thinking?! Can you ever really trust a curry on Brick Lane? Please, please, someone disabuse me of my belief that Brick Lane curries are amongst the most inferior offerings from the legendary culinary cauldron of India/Bangladesh/Pakistan. So, I thought that, at the very least, the lauded Shampan, (Bangladeshi specialities) would come good!

How wrong I was; with the exception of a rather tasty and almost basque sounding Lamb Xacuti - a slow roasted lamb with tamarind, fierce bird's eye chillies, garlic, coriander and cumin.

Ok, what not to have:

King Prawn Puri - Shame on you Shampan, this should be easy! Tired, greasy, limp puri, and an almost artificially sweet, tomato drenched curry, served on, what I can only assume is some kind of ex-prison aluminium tray, with the most paltry, wilted shredded lettuce, i have seen in some considerable while.

The chicken jalfrezi had an artificial quality resonant of too much dried chicken stock - a kind of verisimilitude of actual chicken. I am convinced that this is the lowest grade, battery bird - flavourless and pulpy.

Our guest, a vegetarian, decided upon a selection of sides (querkily named "sundries" on the menu). So, here we go:
Tarka dal - unseasoned, and reeking of that dried chicken stock again
Sag paneer - amongst the greatest travesties of the meal. Now I know that the Bangladeshi like their jaggery, but really, this tasted more like dessert.
Mushroom bhaji - Over which I tried to fight my guests, but they were insistent. White, closed cup mushrooms, in coriander and spices (i'm always suspicious of the catch all "spices") - GROSS!

...and finally the breads - stuffed paratha (some odd collection of starchy, illuminous veg), served slightly off warm - honestly, I nearly gipped!
Keema naan - I know, you are all saying, "well, Matt, what did you expect? Keema naan, is always, almost without exception,RANK!", but we ploughed on inspite of the niggling voice in my head to the contrary...and we weren't dissapointed, well actually, we were. It was indeed, limp, underseasoned, the meat of suspect origin and off-warm (the polite way of saying cold - HA!, now I'm holding back)

WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!

...and the question has to be asked, why? I just don't get it. There is so much competition on Brick Lane, and I have had a fair few Rubys, but the restaurants seem to resolutely not give a shit about respecting the food of their homeland or the clients whom they are feeding.

I have cooked with many friends from India and Pakistan and they always give a wry smile when I mention Brick Lane. They universally chime "have you ever been to a Harvester before", and I cock my head and respond, "elaborate". They go on to explain that in much the same way that British cooking has been bastardised and reduced to the LCD for a particular market, at a particular price point, thus with Indian food in the UK.

This is the Indian paradox, similar to the Chinese paradox, whereby we, in the UK, are peddled anglicised versions of the truth. Don't get me wrong, I know what the culinary truth looks and tastes like in China and India, and sometimes it is unpalatable to us here in the UK. But, I hold that this is no excuse for crap! When I say crap, I mean low grade poultry, meat and fish; over oily breads - cooked at the beginning of service and then re-fried just before service - I mean that is truly rank! "Sundries" which taste like under-seasoned after-thoughts - NO, NO, NO!

A couple of years ago I was taken to Benares (http://www.benaresrestaurant.com/) for my birthday. Now I realise that it is inappropriate to compare Brick Lane to Benares, but I think, and I know that Atul Kochar would agree with me that anglicised Indian food can look and taste stunning and delicious. There doesn't need to be a "spicy onion gravy" that is the base to every dish.

Stop me if I'm wrong, but I think we are all increasingly aware of food miles, seasonality and food provenance and i think that this (quoted from the Shampan menu):
"Exotic fresh water fish of Bangledesh
Throughout the world people are becoming more aware of the health advantages of including more fish in their diet." They go on to list a minimum of 4 fish dishes - fish indigineous to the Bay of Bengal. Now, I think that this is incompatible with what many guests/customers/clients want. I think they want to see local fish, cooked in the Bengali style...and maybe if they don't then, i would go as far as to say, they should!

Ok, so, I guess what I'm driving at is that these places should make the effort, open their eyes and provide a truly amazing gastronomic experience that the Moghuls would be proud of!

my final note on this - upon leaving Shampan I saw a group of 6 Americans, being customarily accosted by the many "touts" on Brick Lane, and I felt genuinely sorry for them - this should not be the case. Brick Lane is legendary and rightly so, but going forward the legend needs to pull its' collective socks up and perform!

Please, Please, Please tell me I'm wrong and that I have totally missed the point and that you will take me on a whirlwind tour of the best that Brink Lane has to offer.

I'm gonna list Shampan, because I want someone to prove me wrong http://www.shampan.co.uk/

Mx